إقرأ هذه القصة بالعربية
When I was 19, my father pulled a gun in my face. I could see in his eyes, back then, that he could very well pull the trigger and end this long struggle between the two of us: Me: the gay son who was kicked out of the house at the age of 14 and now lives on his own with *gasp* a boyfriend. Him: Muslim man; naturally homophobic. I couldn’t see determination in his eyes, though, what I saw was fear; he was more scared than angry, he seemed like he was the one facing the gun, not me.
Fast-forward seven years: This half-Syrian, half-Lebanese man is still alive and kicking. Still gets insomnia at times; dreaming of the sound of the bullet that never came; still tells the story to his friends trying to overcome; still wanting to just let go. Yet, every time this story is told; it gets more engraved in my brain.
I don’t believe I’m out of the closet now because of courage; I’m out of the closet because of necessity: I’m worried that if one day; someone I love, someone I look up to, someone I care about, might find out about my homosexuality; then pulls a trigger at me. I take a shortcut and just tell them right away.
– Danny Ramadan